Happy 2013! Many blogs are talking about New Year’s Resolutions about now. As a phlegmatic I try to avoid “resolutions because, as a phlegmatic, I need more flexibility than that word seems to insinuate. Goals are definitely a part of my new year vocabulary, but I don’t like to get too rigid. That is why I, the Personality Mechanic, am not writing a “New’s Year Resolution” post this year. I’ve opted for just good, solid personality information to kick off 2013. (I think my “10” is much better and more informative than any Top 10 List David Letterman has presented.)
TOP 10 THINGS YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT PERSONALITIES (in no particular order).
1. Each personality is uniquely wonderful: No two people are alike. We tend to relate differently to people we don’t understand than we do those we know. If we know that others are unique and wonderful whether we “get them” or not, we are less judgmental and critical. If we know that WE are unique and wonderful, it makes it easier for us to embrace and accept who we are….AND who we are created to be. Personalities help us understand ourselves and others. Read More details.
2. Most of us have traits of each of the four personality types: Very rarely will you meet a person who is uniquely ONE personality type. Most people display all the personality types. However, there are two that tend to dominate the behavior of each individual. For example, I am a phlegmatic/sanguine blend. I have the emotional needs of a phlegmatic, but depending on the situation, my sanguine can make quite a showing. Although I am not choleric, I DO have a few choleric traits . . . just ask my family (and maybe a few people that have messed with my boys over the years.) I am certainly NOT choleric, but I can be very choleric in some situations. This dynamic sometimes confuses people who are not very familiar with personalities, but if we understand that, in most cases, two personality types dominate it is easier to figure out someone’s specific personality or personality blend. Read more details.
3. Each personality has strengths: The beautiful thing about The Personalities is that one is not any better than the other! They are all wonderful in their own way, but they DO display different strengths. Knowing that we all have strengths helps us capitalize on those areas. Additionally, when we understand the strengths of others (our children, co-workers, etc.) it helps us approach them with better understanding, and when appropriate, more effective guidance. For example, the choleric personality is a natural-born leader. The adult choleric thrives when they are in control of something, and children of this personality type need to have this trait nurtured in age-appropriate ways as they grow up. Read more details.
4. Each personality has weaknesses: We love to hear about strengths, but we don’t get as excited about weaknesses even though we all have them. When we understand what personality we are, we have a better chance of identifying our weaknesses. That, in turn, makes it easier for us to address them! I don’t know about you, but I love that! As a phlegmatic personality who loves peace and quiet I could easily become a hermit. However, since I know that about myself I purposely build things into my life so I don’t fall victim to that weakness. I play BUNCO once a month, I belong to a ladies golf league, and I volunteer my time at the local crisis pregnancy center. If I didn’t understand this potential weakness in my personality I could have easily evolved into a couch potato. Personalities help us understand weaknesses so that we can minimize their effect in our lives. Read more details.
5. We tend to marry our opposite personality: This one blows my mind, because it is so true. It isn’t foolproof, but I’d say it happens 95+% of the time in couples. If you know the personality of one-half of a couple, chances are the OTHER half is the opposite. I’m phlegmatic, my hubby is choleric. My youngest son is sanguine, his girlfriend is melancholy. I know many couples who follow those exact patterns. Do you remember that famous line from Jerry McGuire, when Tom Cruise tells Renee Zellweger, “You complete me.”? That pretty much sums up the natural draw opposite personalities have for each other. Together, opposite personalities make up for the things lacking in the other.
I hope this information helps wets your 2013 appetite for understanding personalities. Once I complete the list, I’m going to write a post about each of the “things” and explain them in more detail. But, in the meantime, stay tuned for the remaining five in part two.