Last week was a gift week. We had moved the chemo back a week so we could travel to the Northwest to visit our family there. Many say that the greatest medicine for a cancer patient is grand kids. Well – with that I must agree, but we never forget that it was God who enabled me to eat and strengthened me to be able to participate in most of the family outings. Medically last week was a non-event (Praise the Lord). I did, however, learn that there are some physical limitations even when feeling well. Because of the buildup of the chemo over time, my stamina is not as it was before this journey began in January. I skipped a couple of family outings and rested so I could stay with them at the night evens. When we got back to Phoenix we did a blood draw and learned today that God is still granting victory in the war over my blood chemistry. We met with our nurse in charge earlier this morning and all the news was good. They took additional blood to check the cancer markers and are scheduling a CT Scan in a couple of week which they will compare with one done in April so that the cancer doctor can give us an evaluation of where we are in the battle with the intruder within – and confirm or change our treatment strategy as necessary – at our September 30th appointment. We are looking forward to seeing what God has done or allowed – if He does not outright heal me before then.
The when question leads into one of the Spiritual lessons God continues to teach. Waiting on the Lord is, I believe, one of the most difficult things about being a Christian for in this area we always feel we know better than the Lord. Patience is not natural to us humans yet God works on His schedule. Some weeks ago God reminded me of a book by Taylor Caldwell on Paul that I had read over forty years ago. I am almost through a reread of the book titled “Great Lion of God” and am enjoying it immensely. I love historical fiction. My heart leaps at the encounters with Jesus before His earthly ministry began – the stories about encounters with the Apostles – and the descriptions of how Saul became Paul and how that changed him. As I was reading through the book I was struck at the length of the time Paul had to wait after the Damascus road encounter with Jesus and His subsequent call detailed by God as he waited for three days eating no food and drinking no water. After that His sight was restored and he was baptized by Ananias who had been sent by God. After a short time of ministry he was sent back to Tarsus where he waiting to be sent out in response to the call Jesus had detailed to him. Call but waiting (sound familiar) – God had ordained that time to be used to teach and prepare Paul to accomplish His purposes His way. That was some seven years of waiting on the Lord before Barnabas was sent to take him to Antioch – confirming that the time of waiting was over – and there the ministry to which Paul had been called began.
I was also reminded of the long spaces of time between when God would spoke to Abraham. For example – between Chapters 15 and 17 thirteen years pass. Abraham had to endure long periods when there is no recorded encounters with God and the Bible tells us that Abraham like most of us was not a good at waiting on God and tried to do God’s work man’s ways with tragic consequences. He twice because of fear Abraham represented that his wife was in fact his sister resulting in him nearly negating God’s promise by his disobedience as others seized her to make her their wife. He listened to Sarah as she struggled with God’s promise being impossible physically and submitted to her idea to take a servant as another wife and have a child by her and thus Ishmael was born and a conflict birthed within Abraham’s family that exists to this day. On several of the occasions when God did speak Abraham attempted to negotiate first that his heir be Eliezer of Damascus and later Ishmael, but God insisted on keeping His promise and Abraham was forced to wait on God’s timing.
There are always consequences to the Believer and to others when the Believer refuses to wait on the Lord and acts in their own strength, power and human abilities to accomplish what God has ordained. Abraham was no exception. His fighting God’s timing and God’s ways did have consequences. Abraham had to be tested even after Isaac was born and so we read in Genesis 22 the seemingly strange story of Abraham being told to sacrifice Isaac – the promise now birthed. Fortunately this time Abraham obeyed for he had finally come to believe and as the Angel of the Lord (Old Testament reference to Jesus) spoke to him from heaven showing him the alternate sacrifice He declared, “now I know that you fear (reverent respect) God, seeing you have not withheld your son, your only son from me.” (Genesis 22:12). Abraham’s actions during the time of waiting had created a doubt in God’s mind whether He could use Abraham for His ultimate purposes. Because the answer was a bold “yes I believe and will obey” – the remainder of the chapter is all about the blessing which would flow to him and to others. God declared not only would Abraham be blessed, but “in your offspring shall all the nations of the earth be blessed, because you have obeyed My voice” (Genesis 22:18). What, however, would have happened if Abraham had not waited and ultimately obeyed? He would have lost the promise and the blessings that God intended to flow to him and others.
Paul’s story and Abraham’s story put flesh on Jesus’ command to New Testament Believers that, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me” (Luke 9:23). That is particularly true when the command is to wait and follow in difficult circumstances. I often think of the story of the leper who knelt before Jesus and said, “Lord, if you will, you can make me clean.” (Matthew 8:2) I pray that prayer often for it is true and there is not any doubt in my heart that God can heal me in an instant anytime He is willing. The answer I get to that prayer has never been “no I do not will to heal you,” but rather wait and glorify me in your circumstances. So I also pray Jesus’ prayer in the garden, “Father if you are willing, remove this cup from me. Nevertheless not my will be yours be done” (Luke 22:42) Some will say that my second prayer indicates a lack of faith that God will heal me, but based on God’s answer to the original prayer this waiting period has a divine purpose to glorify Him which as Jesus knew is beyond whether we are delivered physically and I believe this time is also for God to continue to teach and prepare me for the call – and for me to finish writing projects God has had me working on for decades.
So the prayer for me this week as my body is filled with chemicals seeking to kill the intruder within is those two above and that I wait and seek to glorify God in the circumstances. Please pray that I am enable to do that for I cannot do that in my strength – for wisdom and discernment not to miss an opportunity to glorify Him – that I use this time to grow closer to Him (to seek His face) – that the Holy Spirit teach me all that I need to know to faithfully complete the good works prepared for me to do – that He graciously protect the healthy cells in my body from the chemo and that it only kills cancer cells – and that He graciously minimizes the side effects of the chemo unless that is not within His will. Thank you for your faithfulness in prayer and for your love which Janet and I sense every day.
About David Maddox – After a legal career in both Texas and Arizona that spanned over 40 years as a civil litigator, God called David to leave his law practice and work full time as Discipleship Director for Time to Revive. That call is really the fruit of decades of prayer for revival and teaching God’s Word, writing discipleship materials and seeking to make disciples. David married Janet Whitehead in 1976 and they minister together from their Phoenix home. God has blessed them with four children and thus far seven grandchildren.
