Am I not the Jesus Chick? I ask myself that same question about every day and every day I hear the same answer. “Yes you are. Stop asking.” But then again tomorrow I will feel the lack of worthiness, the doubt upon my divine design and the role that I believe God placed me in. Even so much that if I’m filling out a form that asks my occupation I’ll hesitate every time in writing speaker, singer, and minister of the gospel. My insecurities will then spiral out of control into every other avenue of my ministry and life. Wife, mother, musician, teacher, friend, housekeeper, and the list goes on. In my mind I’m an utter failure in every category most days of the week. I’ve been preprogrammed to believe that a paycheck equates my value – not a purpose.
Until 2014 I’ve always had a “real” job as some may say, not considering for a second that what I do is a real job. Paycheck = value. Satan hisses those words in my ear, again and again and again. So this morning as I awake feeling unworthy I turn to the word of God begging God to speak peace to my soul in the tween times of speaking engagements and opportunities to sing. And He is so faithful…
I’d reckon that I’m in good company if I read I Corinthians 9:1-4
Am I am not an apostle? am I not free? have I not seen Jesus Christ our Lord? are not ye my work in the Lord? If I be not an apostle unto others, yet doubtless I am to you: for the seal of mine apostleship are ye in the Lord.
Mine answer to them that do examine me is this, Have we not power to eat and to drink?
Obviously the question had arisen to Paul about his leadership abilities. Please don’t misread this blog to be a disgruntled ministry worker. Nothing could be further from the truth. Those to whom I minister to treat me with the utmost of love, respect and kindness. For me this battle is with self and Satan. And I figured if I had this battle perhaps someone else did too and that the reason it was on my heart today was because it was on someone else’s heart too, and together we could encourage one another.
Are not ye my work in the Lord?
Paul’s asking “Did God not send me here to minister to you?” That places responsibility on Paul regardless of whether or not they believe in his leadership abilities. As for me that puts the burden upon my shoulders (that Christ will gladly bear) that I’ve been sent to minister to the people in my path. For which you are one. If I listen to that hisssssssssss… I’m neglecting my responsibility, paycheck or no paycheck.
God places us in a position… don’t abandon it.
Are you not my Seal?
For Paul the “seal” was their conversion under his ministry. I’ve likely not been involved in your conversion to Christ, although I have been involved in others, but every time I’m given the opportunity to minister to someone and encourage them in their walk of faith it’s as if I go home with a seal on my Certificate of Participation in the work of the Lord. My recompense for serving God is your response to my ministration. Therefore your responsibility to my encouragement to you is your encouragement to me. Both of which cost us nothing but time and a few words which are afforded to us by God. How wonderful is that! Especially during this Christmas season when funds are low, that’s bargain shopping at its finest!
God places us with people… don’t abandon them.
Has supper not been set on the Table?
Paul asks them “Have we not power to eat and to drink?” God spoke to my soul this morning with those words as if to say, “Shari, I’ve provided you everything you need.” Why do you keep questioning my purpose? God has given me His Word to feast upon like manna from Heaven and His Holy Spirit fills my heart to the brim.
God has given our lives purpose… don’t abandon it.
We’re all a part of the plan. And if God could show us a flow chart of expectations it would scare us to death! But He doesn’t. He gives us our responsibilities one day at a time. Little bites, little sips… Just enough!
Serve on pilgrims!
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